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Saturday, December 20, 2014

The Evolution of Christmas (#8)


     Like most of you, I love the Christmas season. Recently, I celebrated my twentieth wedding anniversary, and it got me thinking about, not only my marriage, but how Christmas has changed for me over the past twenty years.

     I have a few questions for all you couples out there. Has your, wife, partner, husband or significant other, ever said to you,

“Honey……. What do you say we don’t get anything for each other this Christmas? Maybe we can use the money we save, to take a vacation this summer.” Have they ever said,

“I don’t need anything. Your love is more than enough." What about, “What do you say, this Christmas we make a $50.00 limit on what we buy each other?”

       Did you ever listen to their suggestions? I can tell you this. My Momma didn’t raise no crazy man! One year, I played along with my wife, and said,

“Okay sweetheart…..I’m in. This year we’ll only get each other lovely Christmas cards, and we’ll spend the day cuddling by the fire with a good bottle of wine.

     On Christmas morning, I awoke to a tree, hidden by a massive pile of neatly wrapped gifts, reaching almost to the ceiling; all with little tags with my name on them. Do you know what I did? I ran into my closet, pulled out all my secret, emergency gifts for my wife, and raced to the living room. I may not be the smartest man on the planet, but I’m not the dumbest one either.

     You may have also noticed, as the years pass, the types of gifts you give and receive, dramatically changes. Try buying your wife a toaster on your very first Christmas together, and see what happens. Even if it’s the “Cuisinart CPT-435 Countdown,”4-slice stainless steel model, with the blue LED function button, bagel defrost, and removable crumb tray…… It’s not very pretty. After twenty years, give your life partner a Keurig Platinum K70, single serve coffee machine with a K-cup carousel loaded with the finest selection of delicious teas, coffees, hot chocolates and lattes, and see what happens……. It’s magic.

     I have a feeling this is going to be a special Christmas. Yesterday, I was looking at the latest in efficient and practical, house cleaning technology. I was completely mesmerized by the new ‘Dyson DC65 Animal Complete,” upright vacuum cleaner. It includes: the radial root cyclone technology, the self-adjusting cleaner head, and the reconfigured brushbar.

“What an amazing Christmas gift,’ I thought to myself. I’ve been trying to bring up the subject by mumbling about the old, worn-out vacuum we have, and left an ad for the Dyson Animal on the kitchen table. I know how hard my wife works. Maybe she’ll realize how it would make both our lives a little easier. Hopefully, it will be under the tree this year….. With my name on it!


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